Only in China...

So... as I turn the corner of the park while walking home from the subway, I come across a man that I could have sworn was sleepwalking. He wore a white undershirt and bright red briefs with blue trim. Unfortunately, I noticed that they were form-fitting. He was lazily walking backwards for a few feet… and at my normal New Yorker pace I was steadily catching up to him. I didn’t know what to do – I didn’t want to stare but I didn’t want to advert my eyes because that it just as awkward as staring. I felt like I walked into one of those bad dreams where you go out in public and forgot your pants. And then all of the sudden he turned around and jogged away. ... Only in China.

But before this interesting aspect of Chinesehood, my day was rather successful. I accepted that my job had a lot of free time. My boss did not come in until 2:30 in the afternoon, so Libon took the opportunity to teach me more Chinese. In between lessons, I caught up on my current events on BBC and researched Chinese language lessons. I got out at exactly 5:30, and hurried to my apartment to get changed. I was meeting the landlady at 6:30 in town and I did not want to be late.

I should have expected this transaction not to go smoothly. I received a call from Peter (the agent who set me up with the internship and housing) the day before to ask how my first day went. Next, he asked me about the apartment. He wanted to know my final answer of whether I was moving. I said I wanted it. He told me I had to make a deposit of about 300-500 yuan so that they would hold my place. I thought that was reasonable. I made an appointment to drop off the money the next day. Should be easy, right?

Wrong. I get on a subway at exactly 6 pm. I am told it is a 15 min ride to Laoximen. Wrong again. I get off the subway at 6:25 and hurry into the apartment complex. The gate is locked. The guard speaks no English. I make a few hand gestures and am allowed entrance somehow. I make it to the apartment building at exactly 6:30. BUt there was no one there. I try to go up to the room but the building is locked. So I wait.

After waiting a few minutes I try to call Peter. I messaged him earlier to confirm the meeting place but he never got back to me. Of course he doesn’t pick up his phone. So I wait some more. Then I try to ask a few friendly people if they know where I can find the landlady/manager. One (cute, tall) Finnish man (with his parents) actually called his placement agent and had me on the phone with her. She was shocked that I was sent to this apartment alone. I finally got in contact with Amia (Peter’s assistant?) who spoke to the landlord. He was waiting for me in the room (that I could not get into). He would come get me.

This guy did not speak a word of English. He wanted me to follow him, but I did not know why. He wanted me to give him an unrecognizable amount of money. (Why couldn’t a calculator be around?) Apparently it was more than 500 RMB. Flustered, I followed the man up to the apartment where I met my future roommate. His name was Bradlet (?) and he was Montana. His Chinese was very good but he was very happy to hear someone speak English. I could tell that I would enjoy him as a roommate. There were 3 other people in the room… I’m not really sure who they were. I was a little distracted trying to find out how much money I was supposed to give the man.

With Amia on the phone again, I found out he wanted 1000 yuan. I was not carrying 1000 yuan. In NY, carrying $1000 would be a sure way to getting mugged, so I was not in the habit of carrying large amounts of currency in a large city. Apparently no one could grasp this fact. The landlord wanted the money or he was going to give away the room. I asked many times if I could bring it tomorrow until they agreed. I also convinced Amia to meet me so that it could go a little bit smoother the next time.

By the time I got out of there, I was running late for my meeting with Jeremy, an American guy who just finished up his 6 month internship. We were supposed to get coffee not so far away. So I ran. I literally ran to the subway (at the corner) and from one track to another. Unfortunately, I was not in running shoes. The shoes are fine, but my feet are a little worse from wear. (HUGE blisters on the balls of my feet. And I’ve been training for this! I hardly wear shoes! Feet- you should be tougher than this!)

Jeremy was super cool about me being late. As I told him the abridged version of my story he just chuckled and nodded in a causal way. This is China, he told me. Things are never easy. He told me about his apartment nightmares (being kicked out of an apartment he unknowingly subleased… it got ugly. The cops were involved) and we chatted about all else that is China. He knew even less Chinese coming here than I did, and he loves this city. There really is hope after all.

He was here 6 months and had thought about extending his visa for longer. He kept stressing that 3 months was such a short amount of time, and that I may want to extend it once its up. I’m not too sure about that right now… but we’ll see… maybe. After chatting for an hour and a half straight we departed around 9:00. I got off the subway around 10:15, and rounding the corner I came across a man who I could swear was sleepwalking…

Oh China, you amuse me sometimes.